A Trip Down Memory Lane
What I would give to be in the sun
With sand clawing my back, sticking to my skin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun
Salt water tangles my hair, so I put it in a bun
The same as when we played the games you'd always let me win
What I would give to be in the sun
Seagulls caw and peck my food until I'm left with none
But maybe you'd have stayed if I was thin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun
Sweat drips down my body, "it's so hot, I'm done"
I hear you whisper a reply with a fox's grin
What I would give to be in the sun
Swimming from reality, I know I'm not the one
You ask who hurt me, I don't know where to begin
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun
Seashell fragments cut my feet and I can't run
Whatever I do I'm reminded of you, where have you been?
What I would give to be in the sun
Almost how you used to be when we had just begun
this poem tries to hide behind waves and grins and sunlight, but reveals a much darker dynamic that almost feels abusive. i love how the meaning of your refrain changes as the poem progresses. my favorite lines are
ReplyDeleteYou ask who hurt me, I don't know where to begin
Almost how you used to when it was us before anyone
this is such a gorgeous poem and i love how these lines work together. maybe instead of saying "i dont know where to begin," you can write, "I can't begin" to help show how lovestruck you are that you scramble for the right words to tell your beloved that he hurt you.
This is a personal favorite of mine, not only because its so elegantly written, but because I can relate to it so much. The beach, the thinness, Swimming from reality/ I know I'm not the one
ReplyDeleteYou ask who hurt me, I don't know where to begin.... Society has brainwashed us into believing we're not good enough unless we're a certain body and personality type, but remember you will be good enough for the people meant to be in your life.
I adore this poem. The sun, although a mentor for the protagonist of this poem, seems like a sort of villain in my books. It is an ideal that slowly burns the protagonist out - it's easy to love the heat when you forget about the burn and I think this poem portrays just exactly what the aftermath of that looks like.